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Paying the Price
I stood in line at the local courthouse—speeding ticket, driver’s license, and proof of insurance in hand. On this particular Friday afternoon, the desk was short by one clerk and the line was long by ten people. Most likely, that was on purpose and waiting in line was part of the punishment for breaking the law. While I waited, I sifted through possible explanations I could use to avoid parting with $162. I missed the posted speed? I was in a hurry to get home to my kids? I was distracted? Tired? Anxious? Out of state company was due to arrive in an hour? The 30 MPH speed limit on…
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Grieving Grandma
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The God-Hole
Barring basic physical needs, what one thing can people not live without? The answer is love. “And now these three remain: faith, hope, love. And the greatest of these is love” (I Corinthians 13:13 NIV). We come into the world craving love, spend our lives chasing after love, and die wanting more love. Love pushes me through prickly patches in my marriage. Love prompts me to put my arms around my kids when my frustration peaks and all I want to do is walk away. Love paves the way to forgiveness when my anger rides high. I find love at the center of every close relationship I have. Why?
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Be a Dork for Jesus
I have a secret. Sometimes I skip church. I shoo my kids into the van with super husband and watch out the window as they drive away. Here is what I am not going to do while they are gone—carve out time to work on my novel, crawl back into my fleece sheets for another two hours of much-needed sleep, or click on the TV to watch my favorite show. Let me paint a picture of my Sunday morning. After the Honda’s backside veers left on Quail Creek, I open all the curtains in the kitchen and family room, get the coffee going, light my twisted peppermint candle, and slip into…
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Grieving Grandma
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Marriage: Down and Dirty
As of January 4th, I’ve been married to the same man for twenty-one years. I’ve learned a lot about marriage that I’d like to share. Here are the things no one will tell you before you walk down the aisle, along with some reasons to hack it out on the days when being single sounds more appealing. You can have a soul mate. You just have to work at it. Nothing substantial in a relationship comes naturally—most things need time to grow. Time doesn’t happen overnight. You earn your soul mate by baring the most intimate parts of your being and letting him do the same. After so many years,…
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Grieving Grandma
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When Life Poops On You
Last week, I had coffee with my friend, Gloria, before a lunch conference six miles away from her house. After an energetic conversation, I slid into my car pumped about my novel and excited about the 12:30 meeting. My clock read 12:02. Before I drove off, I realized I forgot her food processor, I’d been meaning to take it off her hands since before Christmas. I left my keys in the ignition, didn’t bother to shut my door, and dashed back into her house. When I returned, a large gray bird had taken up residence on my dash.
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Grieving Grandma
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The Miracle Manifested–Where Is The Miracle? Part Two
I asked a question at the end of the last post, Where is the Miracle? The question was this—What if The Miracle did occur and I missed it? What if The Miracle had nothing to do with the end result? And everything to do with the journey?
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Grieving Grandma
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Where Is The Miracle? Part One
I follow a lot of CaringBridge sites. CaringBridge allows a family in medical crisis to post updates, prayer requests, and needs to a page that friends and family can access. The sites I follow have catchwords like “children” and “oncology.” My rooting in the pediatric cancer community comes out of the four years our family spent battling leukemia with our oldest son, Kyle. Because we’ve tread our own rough journey, people send me CaringBridge links, ask me to write encouraging emails, and pray for their friends and family that are dealing with similar struggles. I consider their requests a privilege. The way I see it, if I can’t take something…
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Grieving Grandma
Grieving Grandma Baby blue—an odd color for a casket. Yet there it sat, next to a mound of fresh dirt, waiting to be lowered into the ground. Constructed of thin wood, the casket was clearly bottom of the line, but there wasn’t much money to put toward the burial. Grandpa needed taking care of. Bills needed to be paid, and I had been looking into investing strategies UK to find ways to make money quickly.
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It’s Only Just A Dream
The smooth scent of vanilla slides over me. A hand rests on my shoulder and I cover it with mine—trace the bumpy veins on loose, spongy skin. I open my eyes. Grandma kneels beside my chair, dressed in her favorite outfit—blue sweater, matching pumps, and pearl clip-on earrings. I bite my lip. She’s not supposed to be here.
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Grieving Grandma
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Courting Catastrophe
The gun was small and black. It looked plastic. A party raged in the apartment next door—music blared, people laughed. Oblivious to the nightmare transpiring in my living room. My mind sprinted forward, sorting through the possibilities of how the next few minutes could play out, while my body melted into the couch, overloaded with the mental pictures my mind produced. I should yell. Run. Do something.
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Grieving Grandma